Manipulators
I worked my way through college as a commissioned salesman. I wasn’t good at it for two reasons: I was honest and I thought too much. I simply wasn’t able to slime and dumb myself down to being a good salesperson. But I feel I understand salespeople better than most, and because of that I despise them.
I have to deal with some real doozies for work, but it’s from a position of some power and I enjoy making sure to squeeze out every last cent I can and to catch and punish any BS they pull. I had thought car dealers were the top of the scuz pyramid, but because I’ve bought my last two cars through fleet dealers–with a little guidance from a great site, I usually don’t interact with them. Though that opinion was reconfirmed when I recently took a test drive, the salesperson was much like I had been (won’t last long) but I was damn near to throttling the ’sales manager’ who inserted himself into the conversation.
But even the worst used-car salesman I’ve ever dealt with is nothing compared to the horrorshow of humanity that seems to be real-estate agents. Luckily there are also some great ways to limit interactions with them, too… but eventually your luck will run out. It’s at that point I remember learning that there are three types of homicide: criminal, justifiable, and praiseworthy.
Some background: in Southern California right now the housing market is falling fast, after the bursting of a large bubble. There is a constant stream of news about declining home sales and median prices. The fall seems to be accelerating as people default on stupid loans, fewer people can get loans, and new housing continues to be completed. Then there is the current writer’s strike (and looming actor’s strike) which are a grave threat to the local economy. Add on for good measure the sub-prime banking crisis and other bad economic news (just heard unemployment is rising again) and people are talking about RECESSION.
So with all that in mind I decide to try to wade into the market (my apartment lease is up and I’m tired of living 20+ minutes from everything). I notice a place on my drive to work, it has a tacky sign about “Condo’s from the 500s”… but I’m encouraged when they replace that sign as the market stalls. So even though the place doesn’t look very good from the highway I stop in for a look. It’s nicer up close and inside is even better. I get my first whiff of stupidity when the salesgirl tries to imply that they’re already half sold then immediately tries to get me commit to a unit any unit to place an offer on. It’s almost amusing dealing with stupid people who think they’re smart… But I decide that with this obvious lack of people beating a path to their door, the sign change, and the new construction being completed across the street maybe I can get a reasonably good deal.
But I know better than to do anything without leaving first, sleeping on it and reading the offer forms. I also notice there’s also a place (about 50% sold) a block away for about the same asking price of the place I’m interested in but with much nicer amenities (seriously, didn’t know some of those amenities could be built into Condo’s). So I make an offer (being careful NOT to initial that they can take however much of my deposit they want or that I have no legal recourse) for what the place is worth *to me* given all those market conditions and the nicer place down the street. I make sure to get the offer in before the next meeting as asked by the salesgirls to help get a quicker response.
It takes 3 fucking weeks–after 4 promises that I’ll be called before X-PM on Y-day–to get a reply. Gets to the point that the salesgirls will not answer nor return my call. (Yet through that three weeks their mortgage people call me every week…) Anyway, after the passing of the 4th deadline I start calling every number I can find for the place, and finally manage to track down the broker–who dismisses my offer out of hand AS he admits I am the first AND ONLY offer they’ve had on any of the 21 units!
Seriously, WTF?! But they now have a big balloon tethered to the roof (just like a car dealership!!) proclaiming “100% Financing”. I’m sure that’ll attract quality offers…
And the thing is, that experience is almost less annoying than the other agents I’ve dealt with these last couple weeks. There’re all these new Condo’s going up, and most are unfortunately represented through a traditional real-estate agent instead of anything direct. So the developer is already paying them a percentage to sell, but you go to these open houses and they have somebody–from the same office of course–who wants to be “your” agent and get another 3% of the sales price. Oh yeah, they’re sworn to represent your interests… right. Because your one-time sale means just as much to their office as the developers’ millions in business. And even though the system is setup so they cost themselves $30 in commission for every $1000 they save you “they’ll fight to get you the best price”. Moral of this side-rant: USE REDFIN if you have to use an agent–get 2% back!
I’ll bet none of the current real-estate agents have even worked in a down market… It’s been up, up and away for 10 years in SoCal and the bubble for the last couple years bought them all new German luxo-yachts. I can’t wait to start seeing Porsche Cayennes being towed away by repo men! The pleasure of the rude awakening to come almost makes up for me still being in my crappy apartment…
BTW, PJ correctly pointed out the apostrophe in Condo’s is correct–because it is an abbreviation.